Coretan diri sendiri daripada diri sendiri buat diri sendiri.

24 March 2017

Changes; End.


Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

It's been a long timeee, without you my blog. As I was busy studying, ceh busy nya, I couldn't find any time or any idea to update about. Fortunately this week is minggu balik bermalam and I am not going home, I actually can do some writing.

Matriculation life is coming to an end. I am so excited but slightly afraid and I think I will be missing this memories. Even though it is just a one-year programme but I really can see that this programme changed me a lot. All through my life, I am that kind of person who don't know how to speak up or to talk in front of a lot of people.

Tapi dulu penolong ketua pengawas?
Yup but my only job was to read the ikrar and none of other things needed me to talk in front of others. I tried my best to avoid anything like that. I don't really know how to talk properly. Here, I don't know how but I actually can do it. I was stressed about it because every time I had to speak up, my ears will be all red, including my face.

How to become a cikgu lah like that?!
I just wanted everything to come to an end. But no more. I can actually speak in front of others! The longest I can is almost 40 minutes HAHA that was the longest presentation I had. Even though there was like only 14 spectators, so what? That is quite an achievement for me.

Other than that, this is first time I have bunch of friends! I am not saying that I didn't have much friends before but the most friends I can hang out together is like four people in a group. But this time, I have 8 people (including myself)! Okay, that is actually really hard. Lagi banyak kepala, lagi banyak masalah. Lagi banyak hati nak kena jaga. As for that, it actually teach me to be  more patience.

It is actually normal for girls' group to actually have a group in the group itself. Or should I call it puak? Nanti orang tu lepak dengan orang tu, yang lain kena tinggal. Sort of things like that lah. I am actually okay to be alone but not that okay. But whatever it is, I am actually appreciate them for coming into my life and change a little bit about me.

The only thing that get worsen is; my temper. How sad I am when my own friends actually afraid of me even though I was mad at others? I don't know how to cope with my temper. Here's come when I actually need someone to calm myself. HAHA where is my Mr. Right?!

Overall, I think my life is getting better and better. I learnt a lot of things and still have time to learn another things. I just hope that I will not be forgotten when split up later. Just a thing to think;

What if I'm gone?
Amanina Mohd Tarmizi -my life-